When Life "Hacks" Don't Work, A Crossover Article

***This article was meant to be an update on my personal journey with autism/special needs for my separate brain-health-geared blog called Rainbows of Autism. However, due to recent issues with that site, I've posted it here on BNH instead...***

I don’t understand a lot of habits and customs “normal” people have, being an autistic/special needs person. There are indeed a lot of popularized bad habits out there among the general population I’d be wise to avoid. There are many good ideas that work for me that come out of simply being self-aware. However, I also have a tendency to think of “life hacks” that aren’t actually beneficial. Listening to advice is very critical so that I get an idea of where abnormal thought processes might be leading me astray. Examples…

• It has been quite the learning curve acknowledging that anyone would refuse to consider carefully any advice of any sort, just because they don’t like it or the messenger. I long had a habit of just getting the words out when I had an idea, often when agitated, deceived, or otherwise in a way that didn’t merit trust or respect. Personal pride will get in the way in those cases, I won’t follow wise principles, and hopeful mental preconceptions I had of a conversation will certainly not come out in reality.
• My mom has really worked on me instead to wait for trust to build with each person. A major hurdle for me was making simple, very brief statements to others when I'm on mental overload. I'm very surprised at how supportive and understanding others are and how they still trust me if they know that overload temporarily interrupts my ability to maintain friendly conversations.
• I long have had tendencies to bouts of extremely utilitarian thinking. Perfectionist guilt thoughts can arise if I don’t spend an entire day or time period doing “practical" things, like working on a money-earning venture, influencing other people, or learning certain kinds of information. My mom encourages me to exercise, get outdoors for natural Vitamin D, and do other well-timed things for mental self-care. If I keep going and going on “practical” things ceaselessly, my mental functioning will eventually tank really bad.
• On the other hand, I can be very perfectionistic about self-care or recreation, too. Eventually, with encouragement, I can find joy in a lot of activities and even find them useful in some way. Even though only some activities calm me or support my mental health while others don't, I can still, say, have a road trip without always having a well-researched fun stop each day. I can also be in the moment when spending time with other people and not have a too-narrow concept of how I can relax and still be productive in each moment.